Can you spot the Talking-Head bike stand?

Former Talking Heads front-man, bike enthusiast & advocate, David Byrne, takes us on a ride in Brooklyn, to show off-his latest project - designing bike racks.

That’s right, bike racks or bike-stands as we call em’.

Reminds me D.B was in New Zealand a couple of weeks back, doing all the material he did in collaboration with Brian Eno – the pinnacle of his career, if I do say so myself, but I digress, back to things bikes.

The question is - do New Yorkers want to use his works of functional art?

In the second video, a couple of hard-case dudes travel in Byrne’s wake, to see the racks are utilised by the riding public, or simply ignored?



By the way if you haven’t heard of Talking Heads, I’m afraid I’m going to have to shoot you.

PS: F#ck I love You-Tube when you find neat crap like this.

69er Mountain Bikes (yes, really)

Oi, I stumbled upon a bike on the internet called a 69er – and with a moniker like that, it immediately and not unsurprisingly, got my attention.

The 69er is by Trek, and its claim to fame is it sports a 29inch wheel on the front and a 26 on the back.

The 69er comes in all flavours (single-speed, rigid frame, hard-tail, full suspension)

I guess Trek think, this is the way of getting ‘the best of both worlds’ and solving the endless fights as to wheel size efficiencies, besides giving the marketing department a brand-name, that will get most punters attention.

The concept of having a larger wheel at the front and a smaller one at the back is not a modern one, I remember in the mid 80’s Cannondale had a mass-production bikes that boasted a 26” front and a 24” rear.

Google tells me these were the SM500 (1984) and SM600 (1985)

The photo below, is a Cannondale SM600, and both models apparently also came in a conventional 2x 26” versions, as well.

Cannondale, discontinued the big/small wheel concept in 1988, when they stopped producing the SM600.

This photo, shows the SM600 (26 + 24) beside the SM700 (26 + 26)

I’m sure some buff who stumbles upon this site, will correct me if my little history lesson is wrong (which is highly likely in cases like this) Ask for a 69 at your local bike-shop. Dare ya.

Footnote: To those that habitat English speaking nations, both the name and notoriety French singer song writer Serge Gainsbourg's are equally unfamiliar. It was the same for me too, until Mick Harvey (Nick Cave and Bad Seeds, Birthday Party) released two albums in the mid 90’s,that were English language tributes to Gainsbourg’s not inconsiderable work .I was immediately sold at that point – this dude & his erotic pop sound, is so cool. Rarely sober Serge (who died in 1991) was a crusty-old deviate, with a voice that reflected his chain-smoking habit, and the ability to write kitsch lounge music, that has no rival. Go to You Tube type his name in and enjoy – then go out and buy Mick Harvey’s two albums to appreciate the lyrics .

Lubricants – no, not that sort!

Now and again, you find a product you think is worthy of a gratuitous plug ,and this is one of them.

I’m talking about Rock N’ Roll lubrication, and I’m about to “sing its praises”.

This stuff is the bee’s knees on your drive-chain, and here’s a few of my observations why it’s a crash-hot product ….

Rock N’ Roll provides a protective covering, as opposed to sticking to the chain like that normal ‘thick’ oil we were raised-on as kids. It magically leaves a waxy residue on ones drive-chain.

It cleans, as well as lubes = self cleaner = no more messy cleaning jobs doing those chains, when you have more important things to do with your life – like surf for porn on the internet.

It has great stick-ability and in my experience R & R works in rain, mud, hail & snow (yes, snow, would I lie to you?)

It’s especially fab in dusty conditions.

It’s also cheap, remember to shake before applying, and read the instructions.

Oh yeah, before I forget - go for the blue bottle labelled ‘Extreme’ and make sure you take-off the top of the shop receipt, leaving just the ‘interesting information’ to remain ( 1 x Bottle of ‘Extreme Lubrication’ , $15) & place the receipt strategically on your bedside cabinet – where it can be found!

The Pushbike Song!

Perchance I ran across, this 1971 bubblegum song, from Aussie band The Mixtures, deep within the dusty vaults of You Tube.

O.K a triceratops bone, is less dated.

Even 37 years later, astute listeners will pick the similar feel to this cheesy tune with that of Mungo Jerry – not surprising, since The Mixtures first hit, was a word-perfect cover of his song ‘In the Summertime’, and the similarities in musical flavours didn’t end there. In a grand irony & in a some-what reciprocal fashion, Mungo went on to cover ‘The Pushbike Song’.

The Pushbike Song went to number one in Australia & New Zealand (two weeks in May 1971 in local charts) and as high as number two in the U.K Charts.

The songs main claim to fame, was it was the first ‘far dinkum home-grown’ international hit from an Aussie band, written by an Australian, produced & recorded in Australia.

In more trivia, the vocalist and one of the songwriters was Peter Williams, who is a Kiwi (bringing into doubt those claims, the song was 100% Australian in origin) and is still floating about in Auckland musical circles.

As hard as it is to believe, the bands drummer (John Creech) toured with Kylie Minogue, only two years ago!

The Mixtures broke-up in 1976, a good thing to!

Mountain-Bike Group-Sets: A Beginners Guide

The term group-set comes from the Italian word for group (‘gruppo’) and defines a component manufacturer's organised collection of mechanical parts. It generally refers to all of the ‘running’ components that make up a bicycle, excluding the frame, forks, stem, wheels, tires, and the bits you hold-on with, like the saddle and handlebars.

So a group-set comprises: crank, bottom bracket, front derailleur, rear derailleur, cluster, brake/gear levers, cables, calipers and chain.


Shimano and SRAM are the big two manufactures of bike group-sets for mountain-bikes.

Shimano and Campagnolo fight it out on the road.

The Japanese bicycle company Shimano have been around since way back in 1921, and have always been a market leader (with a share 80-90%, depending on the country) in terms of high-end bicycle components (road/off-road) as well as some of the best ranges of cheaper bike parts and cycle components.

The Shimano group-sets are marked out by a series of letters.

The 2008 ranking of Shimano mountain bike components is (from best to worst):

XTR
Deore XT
SLX
Deore LX
Deore
Alivio
Altus

Footnote: To equate these to what’s on a road-bike, it’s XTR = Dura Ace, Deore XT = Ultegra, Deore LX = 105, Deore = Tiagra, Alivio = Sora

Not quite the new kid on the block, (they’ve been about since 1987) the other major MTB group-set manufacturer is U.S based SRAM, which is steadily gaining ground on its Japanese competitor. This company started out with Grip shift, a twist grip shifter company, and has grown into a huge international company with a broad range of components from suspension forks to cranks, mainly by acquisition of other parts manufacturers. SRAM now own fork giants Rockshox, crank manufacturers Truvativ, and brake manufacturers Avid. So SRAM offers parts under different brand names and it’s only the Shifters, Chains, Cassettes – that you’ll see the name SRAM. So you need to get this straight in your head, unlike Shimano, SRAM do not produce their group-set range, under the one banner (rumour has it, 2010 is the year, this quirk of business will change)

Footnote: Another SRAM subsidiary company, you’ve probably heard of, is Zipp the wheel manufacturer.

SRAM rank their branded mountain bike components (from best to worst):

X-0
X-9
X-7
SX-5
SX 4
3.0

And here’s how both Group Sets rank, were we to line-up Shimano & SRAM together, and compare their respective product range.

Shimano versus SRAM dollar for dollar & pound for pound (over 12 rounds, no standing 8 count)


XTR = X.0.....Pro: Lightest strongest most efficient
XT = X.9.....Expert: Light, strong, durable, efficient
LX = X.7.....Sport: Strong, durable reliable
Deore = X.5.....Sport: Strong reliable
Alivio = X.4.....Recreational
Acera = X.3.....Recreational
Altus = No comparitive.....Entry Level

Confused by now?

You should be, and to make things worse for the uninitiated, few complete bikes actually come with a full group set of the same brand. Manufacturers/importers tend to mix and match, in order mainly to save costs. So if SRAM gives them the best deal on cassettes at a set level – that’s what will be on the bike.

So print this off, before you next venture into a bike-shop, and appear for all intents and purposes, to be a well-versed punter, to the ‘all-knowing’ tech freak selling you a bike. Go forth, fully prepared to throw-in a few terms like, “how does XT compare to X9”? Or “why is this bike running quality XTR on one part & only LX on another?”.

It’s true I tell ya - beer is better for athletes than water!

As a beer-drinker of some long-standing, I know incurable addicts like me, tend to grasp-hold of any small anecdote or tit-bit of information, to help justify the continued over-consumption of our favourite tipple.

On a very rare occasion (frequency of Hayley’s Comet) science & the medical profession comes to our rescue, so when I read recently, that Spanish research has established beer was better than water as a post-exercise fluid – I used what brain cells alcohol hadn’t destroyed, to make mental notes on this ground-breaking discovery (let’s face it, even your drinking buddies at the pub, are not going to believe this one)

The following are these mental notes, and what you need to regurgitate the moment the opportunity to produce such ‘a gem’ dictates.

- A study done by Granada University in Spain has discovered that beer is better for post-workout hydration than plain water.
- The students who were tested, ran on a treadmill in very hot temperatures. After the exercise half the group were given a pint of beer, while the others received the same volume of water.
- The results were: beer had a superior hydrating affect than water.
- The professor who undertook the study believes the carbon dioxide in beer, helps quench the thirst more quickly & it’s carbohydrate content replaces calories lots in exercise as well.

Momentous breakthroughs like this surely have to go close to a Noble Prize of some kind, but need more study, and you and I can assist here by putting our livers on the line.

Purely in the interests of sports science, I’ve decided to put this one to the acid test, and I’m calling for others in the mountain-bike fraternity to consider joining me conducting a worldwide study.

Cycling Book Review: ‘Llamas and Empanadas’

As the title suggests, the setting for this book, is South America.

The other two main ingredients, are an over-burdened mountain-bike called ‘Vagabunda’, and its Kiwi rider, Eleanor Meechan.

Yes, you picked-it, Eleanor, is a chick and yes, she did go solo through the dubious back-blocks, barren wastes of this vast continent.

In this 260 page book, Meechan colourfully describes her 2004, five thousand kilometre biking-journey which zigzags between Argentina and Chile.

This is more than ‘just another travelogue‘, of interest to the few other unique souls who would consider an arduous & potentially dangerous journey of this nature .

Some authors have an ability to engross their readers, not just with pictorial and introspective writings - but recreate the characters of the people they meet.

Meechan is one of those gifted authors, who extends her recollections beyond the share trials and tribulations of her bicycle journey.

The appeal of Llamas and Empanadas is broad.

It is not just a non-fiction adventure title, for those who like cycling.

It’s a book you could pass onto your partner to read, knowing they would get something from its inspirational pages.

This is a book, worthy of your investment.

ISBN- 9780143006404.

It came out in 2007 and I got my copy at Whitcoulls.

PS: In case you needed any more encouragement take a look at Eleanor pictorial record of the journey at her flickr site.

Mountain-Biking Naseby

I’ve been biking in and around Naseby for 20 odd years, travelling down south three times from Christchurch this year alone. The last time I ventured into the ‘Black Forest’ that surrounds the small Central Otago township, was in August, and there was two foot of snow on the ground then – now that’s a blast. Naseby's appeal is therefore not isolated to the warmer months, its the perfect hang-out for that winter blow-out!

Tip 1: If you are travelling down to Naseby in winter to do a bit of riding, try coinciding the trip to tie-in with the new Ice-Luge they have up & going ( snow-making capabilities permitting)

So being a creature of habit, we packed-up the car at Christmas, to renew our on-going illicit love-affair.

For a place that boasts a permanent population of 150, ‘little old’ Naseby boasts a number of mountain-bike friendly resources, all within easy grasp (a.) It’s very own eclectic bike shop, run by the irrepressible Kila Hepi (that’s Kila as in the band). No one knows the forest tracks like Kila & hidden away in the dusty corners of his bike shop on the main street, is a veritable treasure trove of bike bits & pieces. (b.) Two pubs, with real character. The colloquial names given to them are ‘the top pub’ (The Ancient Briton) and ‘the lower pub’ (The Royal) My preferred drinking-hole is The Ancient Briton – whether this a recommendation or an indictment is subjective (c.) An old-time Kiwi dairy, which brings soothing images floating back from ones childhood.

Only known photo of Kila in his home environment, accompanied by his trusty companion 'Ice' the mutt.

Tip 2: Kila hires bikes out and has these nifty attachments you place on the rear of bikes to enable you to 'tow' youngsters along.

The big plus’s going for Naseby are (a.) there’s something there for riders of all levels and ages (b.) variety of riding environments, single-track, shingle roads, down-hill etc, you name it, it’s there in abundance (c.) proximity to other locations in The Maniatoto.

Naseby is great for families, a safe environment where ‘kids can be kids’, far from the lure of playstations. Who cares if the little buggers, graze their knees, now and again, eh?

Tip 3: From Naseby you are close enough to be able to take the ‘prime bites’ off The Rail Trail or travel up into The Danseys Pass. For the super-fit have a go at Mount Buster.

Here's a Map of Naseby Forest. [Footnote: All my maps are are in the same accessible folder]

Just remember, there are tracks everywhere in The Black Forest (yes, that’s it’s real name, and it was planted in 1900) and this map is for the less-adventurous or those travelling through with not much time on their hands to explore it’s environs to the fullest.

Tip 4: Virtually every forest track you stumble upon, has another one running off it or parallel. It’s impossible to get lost as such, but it’s nice trying.

Just remember some of the tracks are very technical and you’ll risk coming a-cropper if you are not skilled enough to handle some of the down hills etc.

Don’t be a plonker like me and try and tackle something that’s way out of your depth. Choose tracks commensurate with your testosterone level (refer my photo below)

Chain-Ring Tattoos are all the fashion in mountain-biking circles.

Recommended Naseby Accommodation for those on a budget:

The Larchview Holiday Camp

Recommended Naseby Accommodation for those who want some home comforts:

The Naseby Lodge

Tip 6: A small note for anyone who is staying, eating or drinking at the newly constructed Naseby Lodge, the head chef there is Brent and he’s a mad keen mountain-biker who’s ridden tracks around the globe and a mine of knowledge. Now and again Kila can be found masquerading as a bar-man there as well.

Note: In April every year the good people in The Otago Mountain Biking Club, organise a 12 Hour Challenge in the Naseby Forest - which attracts glowing reports and big numbers. More details on this years event, to be held on 25th April here. I’ve ridden the 12 Hour course several times, and it’s fair to say the terrain it runs through, is fairly relentless on ones legs, heart and lungs, for old pricks like me. There are few parts where you can rest either physically or mentally, so put it this way - it's a real test.

How to recognise an old-school mountain biker.

Let’s look beyond the obvious bald-spots and grey hair, and find other traits to spot ‘the lesser beer potted old-school mountain biker’.

1.) The ‘fashion victim’ wardrobe of miss-matched attire, all of which is in dishevelled condition.
2.) Coming from an era of the cantilever brake, you’ll see them employ a two fingered brake-technique, even on disc-brakes.
3.) Will own at least three mountain-bikes of which only one will be in ride-able condition, the others falling in to a loose category of ‘projects’.
4.) Maintains a relentless exercise in revisionist history, founded on the bedrock that “they don’t make em’ as good as they use to”.
5.) Possesses a ‘colourful’ brash vocabulary, include the stock reply, when things get tough to “toughen-up”
6.) Has the ability to spin-a-yarn that makes everything in the past seem like it was a by-gone age out of a Peter Jackson movie, rather than just two decades ago.
7.) Ability to consume large quantities of beer in a short time, without any noticeable adverse affects to riding ability.

Pro’s & Con’s of owning a 29” Mountain Bike

Excerpt from 'Dirt Rag' Magazine interview with Wes Williams of Willets Cycles, one of the guys behind the 29” scene:

Dirt Rag: “Who do you see as potential customers for 29”?

Wes Williams: “I think the potential customers are the more intellectual ones. In other words, smarter people are going to be buying these bikes. Older, smarter people. Because it is a more intelligent concept-it works better. It's the stubborn, dumb guys that won't get it”.


The world of mountain-biking is full of anecdotes & everyone has their own preferences. With a pile of their hard-earned dosh tired-up in their hunk of metal, riders will ‘debate till the cows come home’ why their chosen ‘steed’ is superior to someone else’s chosen ‘steed’.

So I’m putting my cards on the table up front – I run a 29er, have done so for four months.

It’s the most expensive bike I’ve ever purchased and the only one I’ve bought ‘brand new’.

Salsa ‘El Mariachi’(8 speed)- which I even cleaned before I took the photo, now that’s a first in itself!

Before that, I had a Specialized Stumpjumper, which I’ve given away to a mate & we still have a 26” M/B in the household – my son’s Gary Fisher ‘Hookooekoo’ (who the hell names these bloody bikes?)

So I’m going to give you my own humble opinion, about owning & riding a ‘two niner’ bike so you can chew it around, spit it out or swallow it, as you so please.

THE PRO’S OF 29”

- Rolls over everything & I mean everything!
- Smoother ride.
- On shitty, muddy tracks with the increased ‘tire contact’ the 29er has better grip – even more so if you employ a set of larger gnarly tires.
- Perfect for typical Kiwi ‘back country’ dusty shingle roads.
- You have a bike that’s ‘different’ – rebellious.

THE CON’S OF 29”

- Slow off the mark.
- Wheels are heavier.
- Not as nimble on single track
- Next to no one else in this ‘back-water’ called New Zealand owns one, so even getting tubes can be an issue. In ‘The Molesworth Muster’ out of the 800 odd competitors only two of us were running 29”ers and there were only 4 ‘non-suspension’ bikes – that I spotted at least.
- Anyone else who runs a 26” thinks you’re a freak, and this is a passing fad.
- You risk being left with a ‘beta’ video-player when everyone else is running a ‘VHS’
- Riders need to be more conscious of the sizing and get the right set-up

Important:

You need to ride a 29er first before forking-out the $. May be -it’s not for you. Seek out as much info as you can get and don’t just rely on what your mate or ‘the guy in the shop’ has to say.

Never forget, that every bike-shop on this planet, has a vested interest. They want to sell you their ‘nominated brand’ over the rival outlets ‘nominated brand’ & if their brand doesn’t have a range of (29” etc) bikes you want – then they’re not going to promote it and even, sadly,slate your potential option, based on their need to make a living.

So the golden rules are - shop around - go for a test ride.

A great 'traditional' bike-shop in Christchurch with a good variety of bikes of all types (mountain, road, urban, single-speeds, 29ers etc) is Grind on Manchester Street. They also do coffee as well, which is a bonus.

That’s not to say you won’t get a good deal elsewhere – but do your research.

The 2009 Buyers Guide in 'New Zealand Mountain Bikers Magazine' [December 08/January 09] is a great starting point, without you having to drive all around town first, but even with 45 pages of bikes, from what I can see, they only display models from their own advertisers - not every one available to the buying public of New Zealand.

A fab site which offers reviews of bikes from the owners perspective, rather than the marketing departments at some cycle company, or a magazine which relies on advertising dollars from the very same companies products it’s reviewing - is MTBR.com.

So there you have it - my ‘warts & all’ opinion on the ‘two niner’ bike and a bit of friendly advice, thrown in.

To read about the history of the 29” mountain bikes have a gezz here.

For those ‘owners’ reviews on the Salsa ‘El Mariachi’, I referred to above, check this out.

A Blokes Guide to Buying a Mountain Bike.

Forget the all that flash terminology crap, self serving propaganda & let’s put any pricing issues aside for the purposes of this exercise.

Guy’s when you enter a bike shop, it boils down to two simple choices.

1.)THE RACY MODEL (BUYS LINGERE AT VICTORIAS SECRET)

Pro’s for the ‘Racy’ are:

- She’ll be hot, and I mean ‘hot’.
- She’ll be fast and speak with a foreign accent only bike techs can translate.
- Other guys will drool over her and want to take her for a ride.

Con’s for the ‘Racy’ are:

- You may find some errant, unexpected spending on ones credit card now and again.
- High maintenance.
- Relationship’s of this kind, last 5 years or less.

2.)SUBURBAN HOUSE-WIFE (BUYS ‘PRACTICAL’ PANTIES)

Pro’s for the ‘Suburbanite’ are:

- Reliable. Tea is always on the table.
- More forgiving when you come home drunk.
- Your kids will have left home before you need to trade her in

Con’s for the ‘Suburbanite’ are:

- Only hot when pushed really hard (6 times a year max)
- Any guy with a racy will take the piss out of your model.

So there we have it gentlemen.

So what’s it to be?

The Racy or The Suburban?